:(

I've seen it before but Scrubs 0314 still makes me cry.

my "morning" in less than 160 characters

i'm like merlin xkcd270. dream last night of dom-sub in abstract and watched secretary after waking. maggie gyllenhaal is hot, as is young spader. does he only play chauvinistic lawyers?

Except he's not chauvinistic at all. He's loving. That's the thing. I've expounded on this before, kind of.

I also discovered - or refined, in my mind - the difference between erotica and pornography. It's not just redeeming social importance, though I ignore that sort of question anyway. Pornography brings to mind something uninspiring, something almost bland. Pornography, it seems to me, is about exposure, visible flesh, showing absolutely and in detail the physical act and attributes. Without doubt that can be arousing, but that's not erotic. Hence the delineation I give: it's about exposure. Things which are erotic don't require exposed breasts - or anything else. Erotica plays on sexuality by hinting and suggesting but leaving the real work to the viewer. It's anticipation, not release, which is most scintillating. It's arguably intimacy as well, but that's more a question of what's arousing than what's erotic.

You know, I may be the only person in the world who's main thoughts on pornography, arousal, erotica, sadomasochism and bondage are about the semantics of each.

needing reassurance

So you know that really awkward feeling when you ask someone out and you know with 100% certainty that they're going to say no but you have to ask because you've been pressured by your friends and they're expecting you to do this?

Doorknocking is a little bit like that. Going up to people, confronting them and telling them you want to use their lawn for a sign, or you want them to use this six-times-in-two-years opportunity to vote for you. It's awkward. It's disappointing. And rejection fucking hurts.

I don't know why I'm in this business.

In other news, I want to sing love songs to someone. Nobody in particular, but I need someone to whom I can sing these songs. I wouldn't mind a hug either.

i give up

Not on anything in particular, just generally.

Actually, yes on something in particular. In socialising. I suck at it. You would not believe how much I suck at it even if I told you. The level of suckage is so great that both Hoovers would be jealous. Man, that's a subtle joke, and I'm not sure I even get it.

Like, Hoover as in vacuum cleaner manufacturer, and J Edgar Hoover who was gay (or anti-gay-so-talked-about-as-gay, or something). Pretty funny.

Anyway, the point is I can't talk to people and I'm just resentful when people talk to me because I hate being pitied. Also I inevitably either spout shit about myself or get stuck really early on without anything relevant to say. There's really not a lot relevant to "it's colder in Tasmania than Brisbane."

Oh yeah, news, I guess. I got a job at Hobart City Council that pays well, I'm currently in Brisbane at the Asia Pacific Cities Summit Youth Forum in Brisbane. YP is disorganised, I haven't had a sex dream in nearly two weeks (:P) and I just don't give a flying fuck about anything. I get the feeling tomorrow will be like the second week of NYSF: teh ubersuck.