Wednesday, 21 March 2007

fucking nikky

That's an exclamation, before the dirtier-minded of you get at the title...

Also, before we start, Hot Fuzz was fantastic. Like, astoundingly good. Go see it. Now.

When I was in Melbourne with Nikky, Gideon needed me. And she dragged me away from him because she didn't want me spending time with him, she wanted to spend time with me. But he couldn't say I needed him, and I knew that, and ... I just wanted to spend time with my brother. And fucking Nikky wouldn't let me. Well, fuck her - and unfortunately, fuck everyone in the future too. Gideon comes first. Always.

I can remember now when I knew Nikky wasn't the one for me. It was at Youth Parliament, at what's known as the FOF. The FOF, or Fire of Friendship, for those not in the know, is a campfire at the end of the week where everyone shares experiences. It becomes, inevitably, quite emotional. I take full advantage of that and cry my eyes out. It's good to do that once a year or so. I knew because crying my eyes out, I didn't want to be around her. I wanted ... I don't know. Someone else.

The FOF raises another interesting point, this time about Pat (the subject of the dream, but let's not mention that, shall we? Though I guess he's the only close-to-close male friend I have since Tully, about whom I also once had a kiss dream... very curious...). At the FOF Pat and I always say "we'll talk later", fully intending it. And we never do. I'm sure there are entire equivalence classes* of people who do this. Astounding.

* An equivalence class is a special set which is equivalent under a specific type of function. I've clearly been doing too much maths.**

** I'm reminded here of a bumper sticker I thought would be funny: 0 - 100 asymptotically. God I'm sad.***

*** I wish I were drunk. Or drinking. I need a good excuse to sometime.

2 comments:

Clara said...

Hey mjec,
meant to comment before about the guy-kissing-dream thing. As I'm sure you know, it doesn't mean you're gay, otherwise I'm a lesbian.

Also: how dare you say what FOF is on the internets!!!

Rachel H said...

DELETE THE BIT ABOUT FOF! I can't get all the new people scared and wearing multiple pairs of underwear if they stumble across this blog!